Redundant, not irrelevant

A few weeks ago, my position was made redundant.

Not too much drama. No grand exit. Just one of those moments where the shape of your day, and your identity, shifts overnight.

It’s weird to explain. You go from being in the thick of it to sitting with stillness and asking, "What now?" Leading projects, designing programs and having a full inbox seem like relics of the past. Those who know me will know that sitting still is a bit of an issue for me. And it's quite ironic. When I taught Drama and Dance, my daily feedback to students was "Do less. Stillness gives the audience time to appreciate what they've seen".

The thing is, redundancy isn’t failure (although I've felt like one multiple times over this interesting period). And it’s definitely not the end. It’s a pause. A space. One that can be terrifying, but also oddly generous, if you let it be.

In the weeks since, I’ve done a mix of things that have grounded, stretched, and reminded me of who I am outside of a job title.

I visited my brother, who had a life-changing accident 20 months ago and is now living with paralysis. Spending time with him shifted my perspective in ways I’m still unpacking. I’ve re-joined the gym (not for any kind of reinvention, just to remember what movement and effort can feel like). I’ve been rehearsing for a show, reconnecting with one of my first loves: musical theatre. I’ve also had the flu, spent far too much time on the AFL app, and watched way too much Real Housewives. Life doesn’t pause neatly just because your job does.

In the last few weeks, I’ve been rethinking what I actually want to create, contribute, and be part of. I’ve gone back to years of notes, conversations, and research, especially around masculinity, belonging, identity, and the quiet expectations we carry without even noticing. I’ve been exploring what purpose really means, not as a buzzword but as something that gives shape to how we show up in the world.

And yes, I’m fully aware of the position I’m in. I’m a white male. The world, in many ways, is built for me. I’ve had access, safety nets, and the kind of assumed legitimacy that others aren’t always afforded. I don’t take that lightly. In fact, it’s part of what’s pushing me to do something more honest (and more useful) with the time and ideas I’ve got.

So, while I don’t have a new job title just yet, I do have a clearer sense of direction. I’m working on something that sits at the intersection of creativity, research, humour, and social questioning. It’s not about having all the answers but about asking better questions. About challenging the scripts we follow. About contributing to positive change, even if it’s just in small, human ways.

If you’re in a similar space, by choice or by chance, I hope you’re finding some unexpected clarity, too. And if you’ve worked with me, supported me, or just feel like a conversation, I’d love to reconnect.

Here’s to the strange, slightly uncomfortable, and potentially transformative moments we don’t plan for, but maybe need.